Hollanda’da psikolog olmak
25/04/2021
"I was expecting to have differences, of course! A new country, a new culture… I even came here not to repeat the mistakes that I have made in my home country." - words of a client
These words belong to a client who came to see me after 1,5 years of her expat life. She is working in a prestigious corporate company under a good title. Her complaints are similar to other expats who moved to another country to grand their fantasies of starting a new life from scratch. Being an expat means being the skilled one the home country is looking for. So the term expat feels loaded. The foreign worker is categorized as high-class, educated, and privileged. According to The Guardian article[1], there are still hierarchical words in the lexicon of human migration, and the term expat is one of them.
Under the glittery cover of the expert life, mental health issues are very common to be seen. It is found in a study that more than 50% of the expat group provides self-reports consistent with risk for internalizing disorders, such as anxiety and depression. The stress of relocating can significantly affect our mental health and overall well-being. Especially, the pressure of adapting to a new lifestyle can be overwhelming. Life abroad can be burdened with too many issues. These issues are not understood and left unresolved, leading to severe depression.
"I can't even decide between drinking tea and coffee. I wasn't like this before." - words of a client
It is eccentric how a person responsible for taking risky decisions that can cause millions of loss doubt such an everyday decision? As we relocate to another country, our mental structures are subject to change, and our attitude towards daily situations may no longer be functional. For example, a person raised in a culture where hierarchy is important may seem distant to her colleagues and her manager. Facing these sorts of situations repetitively makes the person doubt. Even though the person is not yet aware of it, it is a direct threat to identity. We all have an image of ourselves. We are successful, risk-takers, determinant, strong, hard-working, and so on. When there is an unexpected change, we get confused. Because what is happening and how we perceive ourselves conflict with each other. This is a very challenging situation, and we put great mental effort into resolving this conflict. This conflict is a complex psychological process that has multiple layers. Our backgrounds are one of the layers that affect this process. In this article, I won't be discussing the factors that can affect these processes. Since we all come from different micro-systems, these processes need to be understood by considering the individual elements. This can be done by discussing them elaborately in psychotherapy.
Instead, I will be mentioning the common complaints that can be commonly seen in expats:
- Anxiety
- Feeling depressed
- Low self-esteem
- Grief
- Identity confusion
- Loss of trust
- Uncertainty
- Sadness
- Feelings of loneliness
- Concentration problems
- Memory issues
- Fluctuations in the mood
- Low motivation
- Avoidance
- Physical complaints (Chest pain, headache, tiredness, sleeping problems)
These symptoms commonly leave us confused. Starting a new page leads us through a discovery state. On the one hand, this trilling state has a lot to offer. On the other hand, a lack of stability can lead to temporary stagnation and, consequently, frustration.
Take a moment to imagine having to re-learn the basics of everyday life, such as getting a public transport ticket, finding your way to go to work, or developing new communication skills. Having to experience these challenges for an extensive period leads to uncertainty about one's skills. Having an incompatible image of oneself results in anxiety, and the anxiety spreads to the other parts of life. The person starts to question their basic skills. For example, a client of mine didn't dare to ride a bike anymore because he felt very anxious about possible negative consequences (e.g., falling). It isn't easy to accept this state. On the one hand, guilt comes along while we are grieving for the life, culture, and loved ones we left behind.
What could a person complain about under the conditions that expert life provides? The main complaint is anxiety. Immigration from one country to another is a complex psychosocial process with enduring effects on a person's identity. The drastic and dynamic shifts resulting from the combination of 'culture shock and grief from losses inherent in migration gradually lead to a change and the emergence of a new identity. The anxiety consequent from the 'cultural shock; challenges the stability of the newcomer's psychic organization. Culture shock and grief from losses cause a severe shake-up of the individual's identity. According to an article by Blos written in 1967[2], this process is close to an individuation process of adolescence. A clean slate means starting over again. As Akthar describes in his article 'second individualization' this process resembles adolescence.
The big question comes once again in the person's life "who am I now?". The answer to this question is the price you pay for a clean slate.
Sources used in this article:
[1] Koutonin, M. R. (2015, March 13). Why are white people expats when the rest of us are immigrants? The Guardian. https://www.theguardian.com/global-development-professionals-network/2015/mar/13/white-people-expats-immigrants-migration
[2] Peter Blos (1967) The Second Individuation Process of Adolescence, The Psychoanalytic Study of the Child, 22:1, 162-186, DOI: 10.1080/00797308.1967.11822595
